What I Hate (And Love) About Halloween
October 28, 2020

Curmudgeon alert: I hate Halloween. I always have.

No, I was never traumatized by a goblin on Halloween, I just don’t like scary things.

I don’t like scary movies, books, or TV shows. I don’t like the dark. I don’t like rides that make me feel as if I could be risking my life.

For the most part, i want my entertainment to be about real people, non-violent, and preferably happy. The only exception to that is that I’m a big fan of Law & Order and all of its spinoffs. But I don’t watch them late at night.

Many years ago, we were at Walt Disney World in Orlando, Florida with the extended family. One of my nephews asked me to ride Space Mountain with him. If you’re not familiar with Space Mountain, it’s a roller coaster inside a very dark building.

There was no way I was going to tell my sweet nephew no. He could have asked anyone — including his parents — but he asked me. This would be my second experience with Space Mountain, so I knew what was coming.

As the car began to move, I wondered if he was scared — he couldn’t have been older than four or so. He didn’t seem frightened at all. If I were a better aunt, I’d have put my arm around him, but I knew I needed to hold on for dear life with both hands. Terrible, selfish aunt.

The ride took about three hours — well, at least it seemed like it. When we finished and finally came back into the light, I was relieved, to say the least. He was grinning from ear to ear and wanted to go again. By today’s standards Space Mountain is pretty mild, but for me … it’s a no-go-ever-again. I prefer rides like the teacups, and I love a nice carousel with the pretty horses.

In addition to my aversion to fear as fun, some of my dislike for Halloween is the costumes. I’ve never liked dressing up in costume. Back in the 90s, when murder mystery parties were a thing and you had to dress up in character, I made sure I got a character that could pull off jeans and a button-down shirt. I added a multi-pocket photography vest of Jim’s and I was a journalist.

My girls were never big Halloween fans either for the most part. I guess that’s my fault. But every year, we’d talk about what they wanted to dress up as for the evening (and the requisite parties before the actual day) and I’d make them whatever costume they wanted, as long as it wasn’t a witch, or something else creepy and/or scary. One year Elizabeth wanted to be Belle from Beauty and the Beast, and I made her a gold lame gown.

The photo below is from about 1994, when Elizabeth wanted to be Jeannie from I Dream of Jeannie, and Sara Ann had no choice but to go as an angel, which, at the age of two or three, was a horrible miscast.

Production notes: Jeannie’s cap was made from a margarine container covered in the matching fabric. I was pretty proud of that. I still have those costumes somewhere in storage.

As much as I hated Halloween and wearing costumes, I loved making theirs. Goes to show you what a mom and/or aunt will do for the kids in her life. it’s the only thing that’s ever made me look forward to Halloween just a little bit.

You know another thing I hate about Halloween? Before I say this, I need to say that I do love seeing cute little kids all dressed up and proud of their temporary identify. But for me to get to pass out candy (which I also love to do), they have to ring the doorbell, and y’all know what happens when someone does that.

Hint: We have dogs.

This year, I expect Halloween to be as quiet as any other night in our neighborhood. And I’ll kinda miss it.

I don’t want this post to be completely negative, so here’s the one thing I love about Halloween.

This stuff. I only eat it once a year. Yum.

Where do you stand on candy corn?


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